Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Top 10 Reasons why I couldn't watch the rest of "Crash"

10. Couldn't trust the help alone in the kitchen with the silver.
9. It was time to check the fields, and see how the cotton picking was going.
8. Had to go and prevent some black grade-school children from achieving academically.
7. I wanted to go through my children's crayons, and throw away all the black ones. Out of principal.
6. I saw some African American kids walking by my house, and I had to keep my eye on them just in case.
5. I I wanted to brush up on my Spanish, in case my mail carrier was not really saying "hello", but "Later, bitch, you die."
4. My black neighbors needed to be taken down a few pegs; they've been getting uppity lately.
3. It was my night to bring the snack to the local KKK cross burning.
2. I saw a black man driving a BMW, and needed to call and report the sighting of a stolen car.
And, the number 1 reason why I couldn't watch "Crash":

I couldn't follow the story-line, because all the black folks looked the same to me.