Friday, December 19, 2008

Aiming to please

Well, the year is coming to a close, and there is only one thing left on my list of accomplishments for the year 2008. To become Unbearable Bob's favorite blogger. I've spent eleven-and-a-half months desperately trying to figger out how to do just such a thing, but to no avail. Months and months of pro-conservative, liberal bashing didn't do it. My cutting edge "Twitter" investigation failed as well. Which direction to turn? Finally, clear as day, Bob revealed the secret in comments: I must combine marijuana Christmas brownies and QOTSA in one blog post.

Well, immediately I went a-searching Algore's internet for "Christmas Marijuana brownies", and found this. Content warning - penguins in sexually compromising positions . I can't tell for sure, but they may even be some of those gay penguins I've heard about. Not primarily a Christmas story, but - really - nothing says "Merry Fucking Christmas" like a cautionary tale about overindulgence (of drug-laced sweets) during the holidays. Scrooge had one of his ghosts warn him about that, I swears. It's in the book, so I'm not to blame if your entire education of classical Brit lit consists of how it was miss-portrayed in film.

If you lack the imagination to tie a heartwarming tale about a cop and his wife OD'ing on marijuana brownies to Christmas, well then perhaps this marijuana Christmas song will help. There. Did you tap your toes along? I know I did.

So, you may be asking yourself - how does QOTSA tie into all of this? If you are, well, then you simply don't know QOTSA. Lemme help you out:

So, the questions remains; how many QOTSA vids have I posted on this blog? That must remain a mystery, because I'm simply too lazy to go back and look. But, let me tell you. It's an embarrassingly big number. Embarrassing because it reveals that I often simply have nothing to say AND because I feel for Josh Homme like a 15 year-old does for the star varsity quarterback.

Can I use the word "Rock God"? I think I can. You have someone else in mind that is making music today? Go ahead and throw a name into comments.

We'll fight it out.